“We are going to be amazing parents!”
“Are you sure we aren’t related?”
“It puts the lotion in the basket!”
“You can’t even tell I had gender re-assignment surgery can you?”
“You remind me of my sister/brother!”
“I’m a Liberal!”
“You have to meet my parents now!”
“Remember…This never happened!”
“Are you even trying?”
“You will live to regret this!”
“Stop looking at me it’s hard to focus!”
“Make that face again for the selfie!”
“I should have swiped left!”
“I don’t think my cat will approve of you!”
“This is the same bed my parents conceived me in!”
“I really don’t want to go back to prison!”
“Hold on…I need to respond to this text!”
“Are you sure that’s not an STD?”
“Can I get some gas money?”
“My ex used to do that same thing!”
“Can I put this pillow over your face?”
“Okay, I have finished, feel free to leave anytime!”
“So this was free right?”
