TRACY AND DAVID’S
Tracy and David
Humbly Request Your Attendance
At a Party to Celebrate
Their Finally Calling It Quits
On Their Dysfunctional Long-Term Relationship.
Also To Be Known As The
Come Watch As We Put Our Entire Lives And
All Our Poor Choices Now On Display
For Your Enjoyment Party.
To Be Held at What Is Now Tracy’s Home
On Saturday, January 2nd, 7pm
The “It’s Over” Party Will Include Dancing,
Photos, Bad Memories, Booze and Food.
Let’s Face It Who Needs A Committed And
Loving Relationship Based On Mutual Admiration
And Loving Support When You Can Have
A Bottle of Jack!
The “It’s Over” Party Will Also Have Fun Games
“Who’s Annoying Quality Is This? Tracy or David?”
“Looking Back Pinpointing Precisely When Things
Started To Fall Apart”
“Is Marriage Even A Viable Institution?”
“Let’s Guess How Many Times David Cheated”
Also: Horseshoe’s and Croquet
Plus We Have A Fire Pit…We Will Be Burning Pictures
To Showcase the Differences That
Slowly Tore Tracy and David Apart
We Will Have “Tracy” and “David”
Themed Areas to Represent Their Varied Interests.
Tracy’s Area Celebrates Her Love of Reading, Art, Musicals
And Photography. David’s Area Celebrates His
Interest in Pornography, Sexting, Dating Sites
This “It’s Over” Party Is By Invitation Only
It Is For Close Friends and Family So
Please No Plus-Ones or Tag Alongs.
Please Nobody Invite Karen. I Am
Sure She Went To Vegas with David
Last Summer for “Work.”
Also, Please No Kids!
Although Tracy and David Have Decided
To Go Their Separate Ways They Still Love
Each Other Very Much. So Please No
Talking Badly Of Either Party. Also
Please Show Decency but Not Asking
David for Nude Photos of His New
Girlfriend. Even Though She Is A
Playmate and Home Wrecking Whore.
So Please Come and Help Us Celebrate
The End of a Dysfunctional Relationship.
And The Time Tracy and David Spent
Loving Each Other, and in David’s Case
Other Women As Well.
What’s Done Is Done, Let’s Focus On
We Look Forward To Seeing You
And As My Mother Keeps Telling Me
“Thank God There Were No Children
Except Of Course Baby Ethan.