Greece…Get A Job You Bum!



Greece, what have you done? It’s pretty clear Greece is in some dire financial straits, I would feel bad for them but they did it to themselves, perhaps if the citizens of Greece would have paid their taxes things wouldn’t have gotten so bad. Also they have a bloated government bureaucracy, ridiculously generous pension and health-care benefits and a lazy ass labor force, from everything I have read the Greeks don’t seem too keen on working, they are dependent on government handouts, and again they seem to take tax-evading to a whole new level.

If you look at the Greek system of governance it looks like the typical model several countries around the world use, especially in developing countries in the Middle East and North Africa and this system of governance is highlighted by one overarching principle…An all-powerful Prime Minister. Constitutionally Greece is a parliamentary democracy, which supposedly respects the principle of the separation of powers, but it is clear their Prime Minister is in control and has been running the country into the ground.

So being the Kick-Ass American that I am, I have come up with a few “Suggestions” for the Dictator, I mean Prime Minister of Greece, and perhaps my suggestions will help get them out of the financial mess they are in, hey it’s worth a shot, I doubt things could get any worse over there.


~Try renting out the Acropolis, allow tourists to throw birthday parties and bar mitzvahs there.

~Try collecting back taxes, if you need help figuring this out call the IRS they are great at it.

 ~You should appoint a Greek celebrity to be in charge of groveling at Angela Merkel’s feet for more money, celebrities have a way of getting money for nothing.

~Perhaps increase the number of hourly tours at the Parthenon.

~Maybe get the Greek people to think up new types of Sciences, Forms of Government, and Philosophical modes of thought, or basis for Western Civilization that you can license for quick cash. Come on guys, you did it once you can do it again.

~Invade Turkey

~Place more tourism ads in Sports Illustrated and Playboy magazines.

~If you guys still pay Rome a 30 million denarii tribute each year, I would stop doing that.

~Greece is the home to Sparta, just get the Spartans to go kick Europe’s ass, problem solved.

~Or you could just remind your European creditors that money is just a social construct that holds no Intrinsic value, that’s right get Philosophical on their asses.

~Sell your thick body hair to hairless people.

Good Luck Greece…You Can Do It!

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