I have been seeing some social media chatter regarding women and their preference in men, some people are saying that the “Dad Bod” is what women are looking for, I guess women find a guy attractive if they have a slight beer gut and wimpy little arms, basically all that time I’ve been spending in the gym has been a waste of time…And Yes, I do workout for myself and not for what people will think of me or whatever other bullshit you might try to toss my may. Even if weightlifting was outlawed and skinny, malnourished male bodies were a requirement, I would be an Outlaw, lifting in the darkest corners of society, I enjoy weightlifting, and it makes me happy so, Yes, I do it for me and not for any other reason.
But let’s be real, we all want to look good for the opposite sex, I guess I should include same sex as well for those that are into that. So given that fact, it pains me that the growing trend in what women feel is most desirable is the “Dad Bod” look. Come on ladies, is that really what you want to settle for? That’s like walking into a car dealership and the sales guy said you can have any car you want today it’s on us, and instead of picking out the beefed-up muscle car you pick the mini-van. And coming from a former mini-van owner believe me you want the muscle car.
So another little news tidbit I have seen come across my social media accounts is that higher numbers of women are seeking female-libido-drugs, sadly there are women out there who face the same issues as some men do, they suffer from the lack of sexual desire. I can’t help but wonder if there is a correlation between the current “Dad Bod” trend women are foolishly choosing to accept as the gold standard in male attractiveness, and the increasing numbers of women facing embarrassing issues with the lack of sexual desire. Seems like a perfect example of cause and effect if you ask me.
So I see two problems here, this ridiculous “Dad Bod” crap and the alarming rise in female libido problems. I consider myself a problem solver, and I believe I have a solution to both these problem. So I have been conducting numerous experiments lately on several female test subjects who claim to have low sex drives. Of course all information regarding their identities has been kept secret in order for them to maintain their privacy, so don’t ask me about them. Anyways after repeated exposures to visual stimuli and the ingesting of multiple Non-FDA approved herbal supplements my test subjects all agreed that I had finally formulated the correct “Miracle Cure” for female libido sufferers. And it also made them change their opinions regarding the whole “Dad Bod” thing, they no longer find the “Dad Bod” acceptable, they were even repulsed by it now….Success!!
So what is this “Miracle Cure” I came up with? Don’t worry I’m not going to make you pay $19.95 just to find out, I’m a giver …So I’m giving this cure out for free. So the results of my research was astounding, I found that if I replaced the herbal supplements with placebos and introduced a well-built, muscular male into the testing facility my test subjects went crazy, their sex drives skyrocketed.
Turns out the women had been repressing their sexual desires in order to handle being with someone who had the “Dad Bod.” These poor women had basically shut-down emotionally and sexually in order to accept what society was telling them they should accept…The “Dad Bod.”
So just to make sure this wasn’t a one-time event with my test subjects, I introduced several other muscular, well-built males over the next few days. And my research indicates that the women had increased blood flow to the female pleasure zones and sensors indicated a spike in activity in their brains associated with pleasure and happiness. Also it appears these feelings of increased sexual desire and happiness in my test subjects lasted for up to four hours even after the muscular, well-built men had left the research facility (my garage) so it’s now been scientifically proven that the “Dad Bod” is harmful to women, it decreases their libido and increases their moodiness and irritability levels.
So ladies, you can’t argue with science, even hillbilly garage science, forget about this “Dad Bod” bullshit and find yourself a well-built, muscular man, he might not be a rocket-scientist but your libido will thank you.
*Disclaimer…No test subjects were injured during this research, and they were all released back into the wild.