What To Do If Someone Is Looking Over Your Shoulder While You’re On The Computer…




There is something that I find annoying, perhaps you get annoyed by it too. I imagine most of us have had to deal with someone looking over our shoulder when we sit down to use our computer, if you’re like me, you want some privacy, and not because I’m looking up illegal or vile stuff, it’s just because I hate someone standing over me while I do anything. So I have come up with five,  sure fire steps of getting Big Brother off your back. And these simple steps should work on just about anyone…A sibling, a parent, a roommate, a boyfriend/girlfriend or if your one of those crazy people, even a spouse.


~Step One

Acknowledge them!  Maybe the unwanted quest just needed to ask you a quick question and didn’t want to intrude. So turn around, look them in the eyes and say something like  “Hey, What the hell do you want?” Usually, the unwanted guest will either leave post haste or will ask you a question, so answer it and then hopefully the situation should be resolved.

~Step Two

If that didn’t work, then be more direct with them, tell them you prefer to browse in private. You really don’t have to be too harsh just yet, but you should make it clear to this annoying pest that they are not welcomed standing behind you the way they’re doing. Be sure to have a somewhat peeve expression on your face and clinch one fist, don’t raise it, just clinch it.

~Step Three

If the first two steps made no progress. Stand up, get in a semi-combative stance, begin telling them that you’re prepared to go to blows over this intrusion, let them know that they have officially taken up space in your head and now you cannot do anything further until they are gone. Slowly reach one hand behind your back as if you’re going for a gun in your waistband, let them know if this continues any further only one of you will be leaving this room alive.

~Step Four

If by some strange reason they are still standing behind you, stand up once again, Scream in a nearly hysterical voice  “What the hell do you want from me?”  Use reverse psychology, ask them if they want to use the computer, act like you have given up all hope of ever getting your way. Most likely they are trying to break you mentally, and as you can see their plan is working, so you are really left with only two options, and they both require you the  “Brass Cojones”  to follow through with them…You can either admit defeat and walk out of the room or you can give them one last ultimatum, telling them if they do not leave when you sit back down you will behead them like a crazed jihadist  and mail their head to his or her parents. (I know a little extreme, but we live in extreme times) 

~Step Five

Sweet Jesus, alright just get up and leave they are clearly insane and you can’t deal with insane people.

I hope these simple steps I shared with you can come in handy next time someone is looking over your shoulder. Oh and by the way if you actually behead someone, please do not mention this article to the authorities…Thank You

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